How to be prepared for when you feel down

Recently I have done a lot of positive things and been to a lot of positive events. I have met a number of kind positive people. A constant worry among kind positive people like myself, is what to do when they feel sad. They want to know how they can prevent sadness and prevent themselves from losing that buzz. This is especially true if you believe in the law of attraction. I am here to tell you that you can not, you can only prepare for sadness.

Take this example, when you are packing for a holiday or a trip it is good to pack some sort of First Aid Kit, even if it is just some plasters (or band aids, if you live in the US) just in case you get injured. I think we should do the same with our emotions and have a plan, or a few action steps to  take, if we get hurt emotionally. Rather than expecting to be happy all day everyday and hoping that nothing will ever get in the way of that. This is because life is full of ups and downs, regardless of how positive we are. These things all teach us life lessons, but dealing with sadness in the moment can be challenging. You are allowed to be sad sometimes and you should prepare what actions you will take to help bring yourself back up when you do feel unhappy.

I have recently become a listener at 7 cups of tea, because I love to help people when they are feeling down. 7 cups is website and app that provides free online counselling. I recommend heading there next time you feel sad and need to be listened to. You don’t even have to make an account, to find a kind trained active listener like myself, who is willing to listen to your problems and provide basic free online counselling.

7 cups of tea= https://www.7cups.com

My 7cups  listener profile = https://www.7cups.com/@Helloworldeb95

Thank you for reading my post and feel free to check out my other posts if you haven't all ready.

If you would like to contact me for free advice, to ask questions, comment on my blog or recommend a topic for me to explore in my next post feel free to leave me an email. at:

helloworldeb@yahoo.com

or just leave a comment down bellow

you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter

I look forward to hearing from you :)

If You Want To Be Happy Here Are 4 Things You Should Stop Doing in 2017.

Happy New Year :) If you have read any of my previous posts then you will probably realise that I haven’t posted for almost a year. I am happy with the decision I made to take time to myself, to accumulate more wisdom triggered by my experiences to share with you. I feel like my last post was great. It had a very helpful message which left me with nothing more to say for a while. I had to undergo my own journey of personal growth. I feel like I am ready to share more wisdom with you here on Helloworld:). Authentic wisdom, ideas that I am truly thinking and exploring in my day to day life as I write.

Today’s post will be about how you can truly be happier. If you have read it, I have a previous post called ‘How to be happier right now in 13 simple steps’. That was a step by step guide, 13 tips on things you could do in the moment. This post is going to focus more on tips to help you achieve happiness through your mind set. Remember when I said Step 12 was to ‘Overcome moods and challenges’. Then I expanded saying ‘Every time you continue to be happy, despite a misfortune you become an overall happier person. The way to do this is, to believe you can. You are in control of yourself and you can think outside of negative circumstances, situations and people.’ For this post I am going to expand on this point because this point is key. I have expanded in listing 4 things you should stop doing in order to be happy this year : 

1) Don't let anything ruin your life. In life challenges are unavoidable, they are a frequent occurrence. To guarantee your happiness you need to commit to it. You need to say to yourself, 'even if the worst happens I will find a way to pick myself up and be happy again'. Your happiness needs to be unconditional, reliant on nobody, not a far off destination that you hope to reach in the future. If you refuse to let any negative circumstance ruin your happiness for good, then nothing can keep you down. You may get down at times that is normal, but you should never stay down.

2) Don’t worry if what used to make you happy no longer makes you happy. In life we have evolving needs and wants it normal, so don’t freak out if you find yourself no longer satisfied by things that previously satisfied you. This could just be a sign that you need to make a change and try something new, for example take on new hobby or a new venture. Be adaptable to change, because that is to be well suited to a life where things are constantly changing. Remember the priceless advice, if you don’t like something change it, and if you can’t change it, then change your attitude towards it. The way you think about life is key so, look on the Brightside and learn to dance in the rain.


3) Don’t constantly ask yourself if you are happy. When you know something is true you don’t question it. Questions create doubt and questioning your own happiness can begin to cause you the unnecessary confusion that comes with over analysing your life. This is especially important when you are going through a hard time. For example a break up. This is when you need to not question your happiness because obviously you are emotional as you are in a transitioning period of your life. You are going through a temporary feeling of loss and uncertainty so waking up every morning thinking am I happy? Then proceeding to ask why does my life suck? Is not going to help you, my friend. It is better to just move towards feeling better every single day.   

4) Don’t assume that other people are happier than you because you honestly don’t know. I can relate this to many examples, but let me just take one. Single people assuming that people in relationships are happier than them. This is a common occurrence despite this evidently not being true, I mean look at the divorce rate! Yes for many the beginning of a relationship may be full of fun, excitement and happiness. But for that to continue for a lifetime? Well that really depends on the person. If you are single and unhappy, then being in a relationship will not make you happy in the long run, because nothing can make you happy. Happiness is an inside job.  

The only thing that can give you lasting happiness is choosing to be happy in the long term. Yes. This means waking up every morning and deciding to be happy. Going to bed every night still having decided to be happy. Deciding to have sweet dreams. Deciding to wake up and smile that you have received the gift of life, for yet another day. If you are not currently happy then choosing happiness, something you need to work on. Investing in your happiness is the most worthwhile investment you will ever make. Happiness is achievable for all and it all starts with the willingness to shift your mind set to create a happier life.

  

Thank you for reading my post and feel free to check out my other posts if you haven't all ready.

If you would like to contact me for free advice, to ask questions, comment on my blog or recommend a topic for me to explore in my next post feel free to leave me an email. at:

helloworldeb@yahoo.com

or just leave a comment down bellow

you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter

I look forward to hearing from you :)

Read this if you feel hurt, broken or tramatised.

Let me tell you a story about what I've experienced. What alot of us have, for this story I will use the metaphor of a house to describe how we relate to our lives. This is for anyone who's ever felt hurt or violated beyond repair.

 

You live in a house that's perfect for you. It's cosy warm and comfortable, you take pride in your house. It's special because it belongs to you. One day you are bored and you decide you need to be more sociable, more open. So you decide to throw a house party. You invite everyone you know. You consider them all friends. They show up and the house is full, the music is loud and everyone seems to be having fun. All of a sudden these people start trashing your house. They think it's fun. You tell them to stop and nobody listens. They smash your windows, damage your furniture, break your kitchen wear and say horrible things about your house. Finally someone starts pouring oil and trying to set your house on fire. That's when enough is enough and you finally drive these awful people, who you thought were your friends out of your life. When they are all gone and the house is empty you are in shock. You can't believe what just happened, your house is completely trashed and you are left all alone to clean it by yourself. You feel hurt traumatised, betrayed. You feel like it's your fault. If you hadn't thrown a party and invited so many people, your house wouldn't be ruined.

You try to explain how you feel. "It can't be that bad. I'm sure you can replace the furniture" says your neighbour. Your other neighbour says "oh my god that's terrible, I don't know how you can live in that house. If that was me I would move."

Bottom line is your still living in your house. You notice that the people around you are still talking about it. "Oh my god! Did you hear what happened in that house?" They Chatter. You realise that none of these people can truly understand, what it's like to be in your shoes and be in your house. No one cares about your house as much as you do. You realise that even though your house is damaged, it is not ruined. It will take a long time to fix but you love your house and not only are you going to fix it. But you are going to renovate, to the point where your house is better that it ever was before. Your neighbours may doubt you, but you love and believe in your house and you are going to live in it, for the rest of your life.

It is easy to decide not to let anyone in, but after a while you become lonely again. Your house is looks better, but there is still some damage. Since that day you haven't really let anyone back in. No matter what you do, your house will never be exactly the same as it was before.

One day you decide that you will let a few people into your house. You take caution and let them know that they need to respect your house. They take their shoes off at the door. Everything is going fine until they accidently spill drinks on you floor. You get upset and tell them to leave while your start cleaning. "We are sorry" they tell you and they clean up their own mess. Your floor is good as new, when they leave. "Wow" you think to yourself "that's the first time someone has come to my house and cleaned up their own mess." The next day they come back with gifts. "We thought you would like a new lamp for your house" they grin. You are so excited, maybe your not alone, maybe there's people in the world, who do understand you. Who respect your house and love it almost as much as you do. They may make mistakes, but nothing is deliberate. They always find a way to fix it and make it up to you.

 

These are the type of people you are going to let in your house from now on. People who care and when they aren't around. Well, then you are just going to look after your house and enjoy it by yourself, because no one can love your house, better that you can and you can't let just anyone in. Your house is you and you are your house.

Even if it feels like your life is falling apart. You can always build yourself back up. Never accept defeat in the long term. x




 

Sharing your creativity

...and allowing others to do the same 

Anyone who has looked at my last post, will realise that my last post is a song that I wrote. This may seem random, however I made my blog so that I could freely express myself. As you can see and hear (lol) I am not a professional. I do not make beats, my sound recorder is not the best quality and I don't have a studio. So why don't I get all of those things? Because I don't want to! (Yes, I did just start a sentence with because, my English teacher would be so upset).  Anyone can take singing lessons, have someone write their lyrics and make their beats while they sing in the best recording studio and top it off with auto tune, while everyone claps for them. (Not trying to bash any musicians by the way.)  For some reason when people hear you sing and write songs, they automatically assume that you want to be famous. Clearly If I wanted to be famous for singing, I would not put out anything that sounded Unprofessional. Singing and song writing help me to express my emotions and relieve stress. People also think they can pass judgement on my songs, for that same reason. This is one reason why I like writing, because narrow minded people can't be bothered to read my blog. Lol.

P.S. Thank you to all of my readers by the way, I enjoy getting your feedback, mostly on my twitter :  https://twitter.com/Emma_Babz 

 

 

I believe people should express their creativity, not because it will lead to financial profit, but for themselves. People need to be less judgemental when it comes to looking at other peoples work, in order to become less judgemental of themselves.  

 

For some reason people think that if they like singing, acting, fashion ect, that it has to line up with the media's interpretation of what is good and what sells. I'm here to tell you that you can create things just for fun, you don't have to sell it. I am sure there are soo many people out there who have given up something they found fun, just because other people didn't see them as being good at it. It's GREAT to do things purely for your own enjoyment. You never know, you might even start a new trend. Never try and put someone down, because you don't like their work. That's like saying, you don't approve of the things that make them happy.

 

I have never disliked a YouTube video in my life. I don't even know why there is a dislike button. You may be thinking if someone post something on the internet, then it's open to everyone's judgement. You can think what you want, but if it's something hurtful don't say it. I have seen videos that didn't make sense to me, but I didn't dislike or comment. Why should I leave negativity on someone else's page or video. It may not mean anything to me, but it will mean a lot to them. Making videos and blog posts are time consuming. Are you really going to say, that a person should give up their self expression ? Just because you don't like it. Just because it took you one second to press dislike and two seconds to post a rude comment. Well done. If you don't like someone's YouTube channel, don't watch it. Watch things that you do like. Create some thing for yourself. 'But celebrities get hate', you might argue. Yes and that's wrong and it's sad, but that being said, some do make just as much money from being hated, as they do from being liked. The rest of us mere mortals who do not intend to be fully thrown into the public eye, would prefer to be left alone.

 

I think everyone should share their creativity regardless of how they think their work will be received. The Internet is a great place to do that.

 


P.s. Dear school art teacher, you may not have liked my drawings but I still draw, ha, ha. Lol. I refuse to be put into a box!

 

My half completed element drawing, still thinking about what to draw for earth. Yes that's me in fire because I'm a Sagittarius.

 

Bottom line is we shouldn't let the media industry or people around us, make us feel like our work and hobbies aren't valuable and should remain hidden, if they aren't typically what sells or what is viewed as popular. Each of us have creative ideas and inspiration we should be able to express, even without the intension of making money or gaining popularity. We should feel free to be authentic, instead of moulding ourselves and our creations, to appeal to the wants of others in order to gain their approval. Give yourself the stamp of approval.    

 

 

 

How to be happier right now. (In 13 simple steps)

 

Step 1: Find music that makes you feel happy and excited. there is a lot of catchy, meaningful, and good music in the world. However a lot of them may have sad, angry or offensive lyrics. I'm not saying only listen to clean lyrics. But song lyrics really can influence your behaviour and outlook on life. This is why it is important to make sure that most songs you listen to, are songs that really make you feel good. Music that inspires you and really makes you feel happy about life. Therefore next time you've had a bad day you can put in your headphones and zone out while listening to cheerful, uplifting and happy music.

 

Step 2: Write a gratitude list: Write a list of 10 great things that have happened in the day. Or the week if you are struggling. Try and do this often, even daily to make sure that you are aware of what you have to be grateful for. Give thanks for the little things. Just the fact that you woke up this morning is a cause for celebration.

 

Step 3: Get creative. It doesn't matter whether you do something that you're good at or not, just do something. Draw, write a song, poem, short story. Do something that will capture your imagination. If you're struggling for inspiration then try step 4 first.

Step 4: Watch a movie, something that will open your mind. Fantasy may be the best bet for getting your imagination going. Comedy if you want something that's going to make you smile/ laugh. Don't be afraid to watch a kids/family movie as they seem to always leave a smile on everyone's face.

 

Step 5: Exercise, go out, play a sport, go to the gym. Perhaps do some yoga or put on some music and dance around your house. Once you've got you heart rate up your mood should go up with it. The key is to just do activities that you enjoy. Make exercise about fun, above all else.        

Step 6: Get out of your house don't stay at home for too long. Get out and about, go to the park if its not raining, go and explore an area that you've never been to. Go over to your friends houses, go for a walk or to the cinema. Don't stay at home for extended periods of spare time. why ? when there's so much to do. You could even do some volunteer work,  to get more involved in your community and meet new people. Spend time in nature, find a nice park or head to the countryside. Sit in the grass and relax while listening to the birds sing.

 

Step 7: Have a morning routine. get up a bit earlier in the morning so you can prepare for the day. Listen to music, groom your self, exercise. Write a to do list. Do whatever you want really. When you wake up earlier you don't have to rush, so you can ease into your day rather than throw yourself into it.

Step 8: Groom yourself, of course everyone grooms themselves in the basic sense.  Spending a little more time to make sure you look great, can really boost your confidence. This however doesn't mean you should judge yourself and compare yourself to other people based on looks. But when you like what you see when you look in the mirror you will probably feel more confident throughout the day. Take time to pick out your clothes. When it comes to hair most people feel most confident when their hair is out of their faces. Therefore I would advise that people with long hair keep their hair out of their faces. There are many ways to do this. You don't have to tie it all up.

 

 

Step 9: Drink water and eat good food. don't skip breakfast. This is important.

 

Step 10: Stand tall, smile and be nice to others. Even if your not having the best day or feeling so good. Smiling and being kind to others will help you lift your spirits, rather than treating people badly because you aren't in a good mood. However if something really is bothering you then it could help to talk about this with somebody you trust.

 

 

Step 11: Tidy and de clutter your surroundings. Personally my surroundings reflect my mood. If i'm stressed and confused my possessions will be scattered and when I de-stress then I will tidy. When trying to unwind and de-stress or simply lift your mood, it can be very useful to clean and de clutter your surroundings. I usually do this while singing or listening to music so it seems less of a chore. When you take your time to look after you possesions and clear surroundings then this can really calm your mind, helping you to think more clearly.

 

Step 12: Overcome moods and challenges. Every time you continue to be happy, despite a misfortune you become an over all happier person. The way to do this is, to believe you can. You are in control of yourself and you can think outside of negative circumstances, situations and people.

 

 

 

Step 13: Always remember BALANCE: Do the opposite of what is making you feel unhappy. If you feel too busy then stop, take time out and relax. If you are bored get busy, find something to keep you busy.

 

 

 

 

Mindfulness : Monday thoughts

Some people hold everything in and some people tell everybody. I would guess holding everything in, is the fast track  to mental  illness. To me there's a kind of shame associated with silence. (Thinking that the truth is too embarrassing to talk about.)

I don't even know if I should take it slow or just take my life in a direction. Any direction ! This is the part where I write about my confusion, while I try to make it sound, great, poetic, interesting. Writing here, because my diary is too heavy to carry. I am too tired to drag myself to Harrow. This is probably due to the fact that I am momentarily feeling this cosy feeling that I haven't  felt in a long time. Where I'm not trying to do anything. Just feel peaceful, just being in the world.

Life can be made more complicated, when you feel like you always have to be moving. Always need to be on the run. You might just over do it sometimes. When truthfully there are so many things that can be done while sitting still. Books written, books read, conversations had. Don't  be so busy on your feet that you run past everything beautiful in your life and in the world. Without giving it so much as a second glance. Sometimes the moment you've gone silent is the moment when you know exactly what to say.

 

People ask you questions, that they could answer better than you ever could. You do the same, when you ask questions. As hearing your truth come out of someone else's mouth, makes you feel approved of. It was their idea not yours. Even though you knew your own precise thoughts and wants before you blocked them out and decided you couldn't believe in yourself. Maybe fear took over or someone said something. But now someone says you can do it. What do you think about that ?

 

 

 

 



Insights From Nature

On Friday I went to the park after a long hectic week. I haven't been for awhile, but the sun was out so I said hey, why not get some insights? When I go to the park, I always take a pen and paper to write down the insights and intuition I receive from nature. I would recommend doing this on a dry day, while sitting on the grass if anyone needs to clear their mind or receive guidance. Anyway I did receive some good insights so I'm going to share them with you.   

 

Insights from nature: Park Lessons

1) People put so much emphasis on having other people around, whether it is friends, family or their soulmate. People want someone else to be everything to them, which basically means for them. You want someone else to be your everything, so that you don’t have to.

2) Success is dependent on what you feel you need to achieve. You could be satisfied doing something fairly simple while someone else will be completely bored. Same goes when it comes to having fun. This leads on to my next point about friendship.

3) The best people are the people who you can do many things with, including hanging around and doing nothing. Spending time with friends and family should be almost effortless.

4) How come as humans, we feel calm when we hear the birds sing, even if we can’t hear what they’re saying? This is because we know that they are satisfied with their lives, as they do not reject what they are.

5) A common theme in romantic movies/ books is that two people will do whatever it takes to be together. We may dream about this romance, but what about our relationships with ourselves? We should love ourselves and do whatever it takes to make ourselves truly happy. We should want the best for ourselves and strive to achieve our dreams.

6) Right now I’m sitting in the park. I remember why I love parks so much, because it’s just me. Me in the world, that is all there is. Forget about the people, the troubles and the obstacles. Right now I have all that I need.

Things to remember
· Don’t judge yourself, by the same criteria that other people judge you by.

· The only standards you need to live up to, are the ones that you set.

· Forgive yourself, your worst mistake, probably wasn’t even a mistake.

· Things aren't just good or bad, black and white, there are many in between. We should know, as we all lie among these colours.

· There is no corruption that can overpower our minds.

How to Love Yourself Unconditionally

Love yourself based on the pure fact that you are a human being.

Many people choose to take the approach of thinking about all of their great qualities and loving themselves for those qualities. While this seems like a great idea, I prefer to take a different approach. I say love yourself just for being a human being and don't try to define who you are. Reason being because we are constantly changing. Yes most of us do maintain an individualised essence throughout our lives, but we may not know exactly what that essence is. We may think that there's some aspect of our personalities that will never ever change. But if drastic changes occur in our lives e.g. moving to a foreign country, making new friends or going though tough times. A big change in your life style or your attitude could alter the aspects of your personality that you previously thought were 'unchangeable.' In life we are meant to change and grow therefore it is better that your sense of identity is not reliant on staying the same.  

 

 

If you love yourself based on a list of qualities that 'define YOU' then you are limiting yourself by clinging onto those qualities that you call you. If you can love yourself without defining yourself then you are giving yourself the confidence and the space to grow with out 'freaking out' at some point and saying 'who am I?' 'This is totally not me!'

There is no need to try and define you because YOU already are.

By deciding to no longer define yourself, you are letting go of  what you perceive as your bad qualities and your good qualities.
This means that you can stop using your flaws as excuses for what you can and can't do ! This will give you a chance to discover new likes and hobbies plus get rid of bad habits. A chance to reinvent yourself.  

It is like the ultimate form of freedom because your evolving wants and aspirations will no longer jeopardise your sense of self. You will be whoever you want to be, whenever you want to be. You can decide what 'you' want to do in your life without assuming that you have to specify based on either what you have or what you lack. You can make decisions based on the Most Loving Action For Yourself rather than what you 'think' you would want.

Every time you look in the mirror say to yourself " I love myself " don't waste time picking apart your physical appearance because it really doesn't matter. However feel free to groom yourself  which ever way you like. Remember how you look is only for you, because you are the only person who you should want to impress.  

 

 

Don't feel like you need to compete with anyone. You should only try to go beyond your own personal best. That's the only even playing field.

 

 

 

Treat yourself like a friend that you would like you get to know better, rather than an avatar that you have to strictly model and define. Who knows? You may even surprise yourself. :)