Dear Overthinkers and Perfectionists

Yesterday I read a few chapters of a book that I found in my local library called 'Love Birds: How to live with the one you love By Trevor Silvester'. In this book the author had categorised people into different types of birds, which were metaphors for different personality types. I didn't take the personality test at the beginning of the book, I just skipped straight to the chapter that I could relate to and that was the owl, the thinker. The key thing I remember, that stood out to me in this chapter was the personality description that came along with it. I was drawn to this chapter as a way of purely understanding myself, rather than seeking relationship advice. This description basically stated that the thinker is someone who lives inside their mind they are completely carried away inside their own thoughts they are constantly communicating with themselves. Then it went onto say that what goes on in this persons mind, affects their life very greatly. This got me thinking about how we are a product of our thoughts and about the extent to which they shape our lives. The part that also stood out to me within this chapter is the fact that it said this voice in the individuals mind can either be their best friend or their worst nightmare. So the most important thing for the thinker is to always focus their mind on what they want rather than what they don’t want, so that they do not sabotage themselves because of negative thinking.

I have been into personal development since I was fifteen, so this concept of positive thinking and the law of attraction is not new to me. However it was the way that this book was written and the time I read it, that caused this massage to impact me more. This chapter was directly addressing the thinker, addressing me, the person whose mind usually overflows with so many wants and intensions, that I tend to think my way out of them before I begin. If you guys only knew how many ideas and how many drafts I have had for this blog, in comparison to the amount that I’ve actually posted. Some of you would say why didn't you post all of your finished drafts ? The answer is that I could not mentally bring myself to post a lot of them. There were all these reasons in my head like; they needed to be perfect, they weren't up to scratch or I didn’t like the idea anymore. All of these blocks and barriers that I have created in my mind have done nothing but hold me back. This what I need to overcome. I know that there are many over thinkers and perfectionists out there, just like me. If you are one of those people, I just want to say to you that I get it. But to progress you and I need focus on what we want and just try our best without thinking too much about it.

Nothing in the world is perfect, so don't let the fear of not being perfect, prevent you from putting your ideas out into the world.  

Thank you for reading my post and feel free to check out my other posts if you haven't all ready.

If you would like to contact me for free advice, to ask questions, comment on my blog or recommend a topic for me to explore in my next post feel free to leave me an email. at:

helloworldeb@yahoo.com

or just leave a comment down bellow

you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter

I look forward to hearing from you :)

If You Want To Be Happy Here Are 4 Things You Should Stop Doing in 2017.

Happy New Year :) If you have read any of my previous posts then you will probably realise that I haven’t posted for almost a year. I am happy with the decision I made to take time to myself, to accumulate more wisdom triggered by my experiences to share with you. I feel like my last post was great. It had a very helpful message which left me with nothing more to say for a while. I had to undergo my own journey of personal growth. I feel like I am ready to share more wisdom with you here on Helloworld:). Authentic wisdom, ideas that I am truly thinking and exploring in my day to day life as I write.

Today’s post will be about how you can truly be happier. If you have read it, I have a previous post called ‘How to be happier right now in 13 simple steps’. That was a step by step guide, 13 tips on things you could do in the moment. This post is going to focus more on tips to help you achieve happiness through your mind set. Remember when I said Step 12 was to ‘Overcome moods and challenges’. Then I expanded saying ‘Every time you continue to be happy, despite a misfortune you become an overall happier person. The way to do this is, to believe you can. You are in control of yourself and you can think outside of negative circumstances, situations and people.’ For this post I am going to expand on this point because this point is key. I have expanded in listing 4 things you should stop doing in order to be happy this year : 

1) Don't let anything ruin your life. In life challenges are unavoidable, they are a frequent occurrence. To guarantee your happiness you need to commit to it. You need to say to yourself, 'even if the worst happens I will find a way to pick myself up and be happy again'. Your happiness needs to be unconditional, reliant on nobody, not a far off destination that you hope to reach in the future. If you refuse to let any negative circumstance ruin your happiness for good, then nothing can keep you down. You may get down at times that is normal, but you should never stay down.

2) Don’t worry if what used to make you happy no longer makes you happy. In life we have evolving needs and wants it normal, so don’t freak out if you find yourself no longer satisfied by things that previously satisfied you. This could just be a sign that you need to make a change and try something new, for example take on new hobby or a new venture. Be adaptable to change, because that is to be well suited to a life where things are constantly changing. Remember the priceless advice, if you don’t like something change it, and if you can’t change it, then change your attitude towards it. The way you think about life is key so, look on the Brightside and learn to dance in the rain.


3) Don’t constantly ask yourself if you are happy. When you know something is true you don’t question it. Questions create doubt and questioning your own happiness can begin to cause you the unnecessary confusion that comes with over analysing your life. This is especially important when you are going through a hard time. For example a break up. This is when you need to not question your happiness because obviously you are emotional as you are in a transitioning period of your life. You are going through a temporary feeling of loss and uncertainty so waking up every morning thinking am I happy? Then proceeding to ask why does my life suck? Is not going to help you, my friend. It is better to just move towards feeling better every single day.   

4) Don’t assume that other people are happier than you because you honestly don’t know. I can relate this to many examples, but let me just take one. Single people assuming that people in relationships are happier than them. This is a common occurrence despite this evidently not being true, I mean look at the divorce rate! Yes for many the beginning of a relationship may be full of fun, excitement and happiness. But for that to continue for a lifetime? Well that really depends on the person. If you are single and unhappy, then being in a relationship will not make you happy in the long run, because nothing can make you happy. Happiness is an inside job.  

The only thing that can give you lasting happiness is choosing to be happy in the long term. Yes. This means waking up every morning and deciding to be happy. Going to bed every night still having decided to be happy. Deciding to have sweet dreams. Deciding to wake up and smile that you have received the gift of life, for yet another day. If you are not currently happy then choosing happiness, something you need to work on. Investing in your happiness is the most worthwhile investment you will ever make. Happiness is achievable for all and it all starts with the willingness to shift your mind set to create a happier life.

  

Thank you for reading my post and feel free to check out my other posts if you haven't all ready.

If you would like to contact me for free advice, to ask questions, comment on my blog or recommend a topic for me to explore in my next post feel free to leave me an email. at:

helloworldeb@yahoo.com

or just leave a comment down bellow

you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter

I look forward to hearing from you :)

Sharing your creativity

...and allowing others to do the same 

Anyone who has looked at my last post, will realise that my last post is a song that I wrote. This may seem random, however I made my blog so that I could freely express myself. As you can see and hear (lol) I am not a professional. I do not make beats, my sound recorder is not the best quality and I don't have a studio. So why don't I get all of those things? Because I don't want to! (Yes, I did just start a sentence with because, my English teacher would be so upset).  Anyone can take singing lessons, have someone write their lyrics and make their beats while they sing in the best recording studio and top it off with auto tune, while everyone claps for them. (Not trying to bash any musicians by the way.)  For some reason when people hear you sing and write songs, they automatically assume that you want to be famous. Clearly If I wanted to be famous for singing, I would not put out anything that sounded Unprofessional. Singing and song writing help me to express my emotions and relieve stress. People also think they can pass judgement on my songs, for that same reason. This is one reason why I like writing, because narrow minded people can't be bothered to read my blog. Lol.

P.S. Thank you to all of my readers by the way, I enjoy getting your feedback, mostly on my twitter :  https://twitter.com/Emma_Babz 

 

 

I believe people should express their creativity, not because it will lead to financial profit, but for themselves. People need to be less judgemental when it comes to looking at other peoples work, in order to become less judgemental of themselves.  

 

For some reason people think that if they like singing, acting, fashion ect, that it has to line up with the media's interpretation of what is good and what sells. I'm here to tell you that you can create things just for fun, you don't have to sell it. I am sure there are soo many people out there who have given up something they found fun, just because other people didn't see them as being good at it. It's GREAT to do things purely for your own enjoyment. You never know, you might even start a new trend. Never try and put someone down, because you don't like their work. That's like saying, you don't approve of the things that make them happy.

 

I have never disliked a YouTube video in my life. I don't even know why there is a dislike button. You may be thinking if someone post something on the internet, then it's open to everyone's judgement. You can think what you want, but if it's something hurtful don't say it. I have seen videos that didn't make sense to me, but I didn't dislike or comment. Why should I leave negativity on someone else's page or video. It may not mean anything to me, but it will mean a lot to them. Making videos and blog posts are time consuming. Are you really going to say, that a person should give up their self expression ? Just because you don't like it. Just because it took you one second to press dislike and two seconds to post a rude comment. Well done. If you don't like someone's YouTube channel, don't watch it. Watch things that you do like. Create some thing for yourself. 'But celebrities get hate', you might argue. Yes and that's wrong and it's sad, but that being said, some do make just as much money from being hated, as they do from being liked. The rest of us mere mortals who do not intend to be fully thrown into the public eye, would prefer to be left alone.

 

I think everyone should share their creativity regardless of how they think their work will be received. The Internet is a great place to do that.

 


P.s. Dear school art teacher, you may not have liked my drawings but I still draw, ha, ha. Lol. I refuse to be put into a box!

 

My half completed element drawing, still thinking about what to draw for earth. Yes that's me in fire because I'm a Sagittarius.

 

Bottom line is we shouldn't let the media industry or people around us, make us feel like our work and hobbies aren't valuable and should remain hidden, if they aren't typically what sells or what is viewed as popular. Each of us have creative ideas and inspiration we should be able to express, even without the intension of making money or gaining popularity. We should feel free to be authentic, instead of moulding ourselves and our creations, to appeal to the wants of others in order to gain their approval. Give yourself the stamp of approval.    

 

 

 

Insights From Nature

On Friday I went to the park after a long hectic week. I haven't been for awhile, but the sun was out so I said hey, why not get some insights? When I go to the park, I always take a pen and paper to write down the insights and intuition I receive from nature. I would recommend doing this on a dry day, while sitting on the grass if anyone needs to clear their mind or receive guidance. Anyway I did receive some good insights so I'm going to share them with you.   

 

Insights from nature: Park Lessons

1) People put so much emphasis on having other people around, whether it is friends, family or their soulmate. People want someone else to be everything to them, which basically means for them. You want someone else to be your everything, so that you don’t have to.

2) Success is dependent on what you feel you need to achieve. You could be satisfied doing something fairly simple while someone else will be completely bored. Same goes when it comes to having fun. This leads on to my next point about friendship.

3) The best people are the people who you can do many things with, including hanging around and doing nothing. Spending time with friends and family should be almost effortless.

4) How come as humans, we feel calm when we hear the birds sing, even if we can’t hear what they’re saying? This is because we know that they are satisfied with their lives, as they do not reject what they are.

5) A common theme in romantic movies/ books is that two people will do whatever it takes to be together. We may dream about this romance, but what about our relationships with ourselves? We should love ourselves and do whatever it takes to make ourselves truly happy. We should want the best for ourselves and strive to achieve our dreams.

6) Right now I’m sitting in the park. I remember why I love parks so much, because it’s just me. Me in the world, that is all there is. Forget about the people, the troubles and the obstacles. Right now I have all that I need.

Things to remember
· Don’t judge yourself, by the same criteria that other people judge you by.

· The only standards you need to live up to, are the ones that you set.

· Forgive yourself, your worst mistake, probably wasn’t even a mistake.

· Things aren't just good or bad, black and white, there are many in between. We should know, as we all lie among these colours.

· There is no corruption that can overpower our minds.

Truly Being Yourself And Feeling Your Emotions

Many of us hide our emotions. We hide away the parts of us that we think other people won’t like. You may feel strongly towards a certain situation or cause but you are afraid to express how you feel because other people may not understand you. Emotions get a bad rep as these feelings that need to be gotten rid of and hidden away. We think emotions are there to hold us back, when really fear is the only one that can and even fear serves its own purpose. Emotions aren’t the enemy they are a part of you and help to guide you through life. You should always consider your emotions with the upmost importance.




Your emotions always communicate something to you. Ignoring them is like ignoring a crying baby. This could make you feel worse.

Does this mean that you should go around pouring out your feelings to everyone you meet?

No. But you should avoid lying about or trying to hide who you are because in doing so you are devaluing yourself. You are basically saying that your true self isn’t good enough to share with others. If they don’t like you then that’s on them. There are so many different types of people in the world that only a select few people will be able to form a deep bond with you anyway. This is true for everyone, because of the amount of energy a deep bond takes. If you change yourself to suit the majority, it will only hurt you in the long run. Besides the feeling of true friendship is a wonderful feeling.

Of course you are going to change throughout your life, barely anyone has a personality that is 100 percent set in stone. This is brilliant because you need to be flexible in order to adapt to changes throughout your life. This is also another reason why your emotions should not be over looked is because at each moment in time your feelings are probably the most accurate and authentic reflection of who you are as a person !

 

'Oh' you must be thinking 'so even when I am feeling sad, and I’m down on myself then that is who I am as a person?'

Well my answer to that question is yes. Even at your lowest points that’s you and you should accept it. Everyone has those feelings and aspects of themselves that they feel are less favourable. But why should you tell yourself how to feel. You should love yourself regardless. You should justify how you are feeling, then seek peace and from there you shall find a solution. Don’t force yourself to feel the opposite of how you are feeling because when you do you are devaluing yourself because you are abandoning yourself.

 

How would you feel if you were very upset about something and sought your closest friend for advice or comfort and they told you to ‘just be happy’? They haven’t even tried to understand you !

Now imagine 'what are you doing when you say that to yourself ?' ‘Shut up and just be happy, act like everything’s fine'. You are ‘devaluing yourself’. Do you know what is more important than convincing yourself you are a happy person? Inner Peace. A mind at war with its self can never truly be happy. 

I could definitely relate to Unikitty (from The Lego Movie) she feels she has a reputation to uphold of always being happy. However the viewer knows this is impractical and when she finally lets go at the end of the movie you are like Wow she's awesome!  

  

I used to do this to myself all the time, it was something I learnt from a young age and got worse as I became older, claiming I was 'just being positive'. Many people do this. But by doing this you are not loving yourself unconditionally. You are loving yourself based on the condition that you are only feeling half the spectrum of emotions. When you try and force yourself out of feeling the lower half you are basically abandoning yourself.




(This is a page from the Power By Rhonda Byrne)

Many of us make the mistake of disregarding our negative emotions because we don't like the way they feel. However they are just as important, if not more important than the positive ones. 


You really should value your negative emotions because these are the emotions that:

1) Inspire change

2) Help you to understand, connect and empathise with others.

3) Are the reason that you know what happiness feels like. 

If everyone was perfectly happy just the way they were, no one would do anything. Life would have no meaning.

When I feel like I have been judged by someone I just tell myself ‘they don’t know me, they don’t know my story and they don’t know who I am’.

You can’t honestly say you would be any different, if you haven’t lived that person’s life. That’s it!

Love yourself and be you. That’s all you can do and all you are meant to do. :)

 

This is a song I feel perfectly relates to this Topic...

Fear of tomorrow by Aloha From Hell : http://youtu.be/D9CLA1KWpIs